It’s not easy out here in these creative streets. Especially when pitching and asking for help is involved. Truth is we, me, you can’t do it all by ourselves.  There’s a overprotective safety net when you have a craft or a brand. You start off as the creators, investors, assistant, tech and all. And for a while it’s cool cause what won’t you do  for what you love right?  After a while you reach a wall of endless duties  and or obstacles that is ever so apparent that “YOU NEED HELP”. Sometimes help as creatives mean a sponsor, an assistant, a baton in your field in order to kick down and enter the next door. For some asking and pitching is easy. For others like myself it can be a struggle. Let me start off with the fact that I was raised by a Woman who made single motherhood look effortless and still provided all that we needed by working for it. I reference her a lot when I’m faced with obstacles, but I also acknowledge that she may have been a little too tough on herself and didn’t ask for help or “feel”enough. With all good intentions that is. Woman and Woman of color in particular are often raised to toughen up and figure it out before feeling. Sometimes not being taught to feel at all.

My belief is if I can do it or research it why spend time asking, waiting for a response and sometimes a disappointment? Also the amount of time I can spend on endless pitches  I could be building my brand brick by brick. Maybe way slower than with assistance, but never the less building. As I’ve grown as an individual and a businesswoman I’m learning that it’s very necessary to pitch and ask for help. Doing it by ourselves  is sometimes the very thing that stints our growth and business.
I’m an advocate for grinding your butt off, but I also learned that without a balance you’ll quickly hate reaching out if you don’t have a direction or vision behind it. Burn out will lead to frustration.


I’ve spent days, weeks pitching and sending emails and reaching out with no response in return.  Sometimes I get  frustrated and ask myself “Do you Pitch, Pride, or Pray Vanessa?”. Not realizing that this feeling was from over pitching and not putting my eggs in other baskets at the time I.e blogging and or following up on my personal brand needs.

I decided that I have to exercise all. I know pride is not usually used in good context but, reality is some of us have it and some should have a little bit.  It’s up to you to decide how much of it and when you’ll use it.  

PRIDE for me is to have  enough respect for myself to know when to not try again or over ask about something I could have researched myself. It’s more damaging nowadays to carelessly ask. It looks lazy and is offensive. I don’t ever want to be on the black list or block list for the “askin ass girl” nah, Momma raised me better than that. Plus I’ve learned to appreciate the beauty in the struggle. Everything can’t and won’t come easy! You don’t want to fall into a dependency coma either.

PITCH has become a part of my weekly/ monthly to do’s. Sometimes I go weeks without doing it if nothing is coming genuinely  that will benefit both me and the brand. I don’t pitch to all my contacts right away. I keep in touch until the perfect opportunity arise(that could mean 2-3 years) P.s I just pitched to two brands while writing this blog post! ??

PRAY when I feel like I’m lost or distracted and need guidance. Pitching and opportunities could get you off track if you are not intentional about what you want. When I feel like I’m doing too much  and uncertain whether it’s the right move I ask God to keep me still and guide my steps.
I’ve come to accept that three P’s will change depending on where I’m currently at in life.(Not prayer though…. I need that daily )
What about you? You pitch, pray or pride?
THE FIT

Old HM shirt(last year)

Skirt LOFT

Sandals: ZARA

Cuff: local Tjmaxx  

Earrings: thrifted 
Chu welcome!