Author: vanavain

My Beach Is Betta

When it’s too hot to wear real clothes you throw on your beach wear.  I know, I know. “But it’s a bathing suit” , but baby rules were made to be broken.  Okrrrrrrt?!(Cardi B voice)Wearing bathing suits with jeans is nothing new under the sun, but making it classy and a lewk isn’t something I see often.  When I purchase bathing suits I not only think about how it will look on the beach, but I also pick pieces that will look great with my signature summer a line skirt looks. I want my one pieces to be a lewk with some wide leg pants and scrappy sandals.  One that is so good that you won’t know its not a bodysuit unless I tell you. I purchased this bra from Target 2 years ago to go to Puerto Rico with my family.  The print got may attention so I grabbed it despite the fact that it was one size too small.  That’s how I get my fake Double D boobs because truth is Momma’s breast …

Daddy Issues

Tapping into it.. Two weeks ago in my Instagram stories for Fathers Day I shared how growing up without a father has affected me the last few years compared to barely caring my whole life.  At least I thought.  I don’t know if it’s seeing the heart throbbing and deep connection my daughter has with my husband or that I realized how important their presence is period.  I think it’s both and then some.  While I shared this on Fathers Day it actually wasn’t the first time I’d tap into these feelings. It was actually a few months ago. I sat straight up in bed and thought  “I have daddy issues”.  You would have thought I came up with some serious invention or something.  Shit made me sit right up. I called my girlfriend Marsha like “Giiiiirrrrrrrrrl I have daddy issues!”  to which she replied calmly ” yeah….”. As if to say yeah girl like a lot of us fatherless women do.  The last few years I’ve picked up on outlooks from women who grew up …

Dine Out Mami

If you watch my IG stories or even watch my food highlights you know that I love to eat and sometimes enjoy cooking. Outside of small vacations with the kids my favorite thing to do in the Summer is dress up and dine out.  It’s the  way I grew up bonding with my family as a kid and now a preferred pastime with my own family and friends.  Just like Love we need food so why not make it memorable and feel good(Ha that’s a nice line) Anyways here are some favorite restaurants  that I’ve had on repeat lately and how I dress. This outfit was worn to dinner at Del Frisco, reservations for two. Brunch   The Farmers Daughter Easton, MA I was introduced to Farmers Daughter a few years ago by someone and been glued there since.  The name matches the decor and the food.  Fresh squeezed orange juice, wooden tables and drinks served in mason jars.  Like a moment. I pretty much tried the whole menu at this point. What I’ve had… …

Upside down & Bloated

Happy Tuesday Sugars! It’s appears that mother nature can’t make up her mind lately so I’ve had to get creative for Sprinter(Spring and Winter) Like if I have to layer one more time I’m going to have a meltdown! Sprinter calls for creativeness so that’s what I’ve had to do more of lately. I had a baby shower to go to a few weeks ago and didn’t feel like dressing up, but was definitely not going to wear this basic as sweater and try to make it into a lewk. Nah!So I turned that bitch upside down and baby you couldn’t tell me this wasn’t a designer off the shoulder sweater. You should have seen how excited I was to tell the story each time someone complimented my look. I was like “Guuuuuurl it’s an H&M sweater turned upside down!” *dramatic hand gestures and all” The moooost I know.Being bloated on the other hand is more like every other damn week it seems. My go to for my disrespectful fanny pack around hat time is …

Self Care

Two years ago I did a post on Self Care and talked about what that meant to me and how I practiced it. You will still catch me doing weekly bath bombs and biweekly spa visits, but since the last post a few things have been added Journaling I’m pretty sure Journaling is just a fancier word than diary for adults. You couldn’t pay me to write in a diary as a kid or a teen, but journaling as an adult is therapeutic as heck. It literally feels like with every word I’m releasing whatever it is that’s bothering me that day or noticing a shift in mood and seeing change through each entry. Sometimes I accidentally fall on an old page and think “Look at you making progress V!” Therapy Although my dreams of sitting on a pink velvet or leopard couch didn’t come true, I’m seeing a therapist and loving it. Having a spouse, friends and loved ones to speak to is cool, but it doesn’t always mean they are qualified to help …

Back to my roots

It’s not hard to tell that my first fashion love is a little 80’s 40’s flair. Give me exaggerating sleeves, tailored bodice and a piece that give Drammma darling! If you’ve been following me for a while you know that I was crazy obsessed with thrifting. The love never died, I just got really booked and left with little time to thrift the last two years. Good problem to have financially, but boring and less interesting wardrobe wise. Fast fashion produce cheap, but affordable quality and the designer pieces like Jacquemus is a mortgage that I can’t afford unless I got a hook up(don’t do those cause if I can’t afford it without you its a dependent situation and I don’t like asking for shit) or snag at an end of the year sale.Over the last couple of months I’ve noticed when cleaning out my closet that the things that are lasting are my vintage and designer finds. Majority of the things I’m throwing out are H&M and Zara things. I still shop there but …

Casual…. I guess

Happy Friday! It seems like Friday’s lately involves my third grader and his school. Last week I woke up late and had to drive him to school. This Friday he tells me that he can wear the color green. I get a call from my daughter this morning telling me all the kids from his school have their uniforms on and no green anything. Wooosah So now I have to take my extra ass to the school to bring him his uniform because umm you don’t get a free pass because you “thought you heard” that green is he theme. I’m thinking about wearing this. Cause it’s casual Friday soooo why not?! this is going to be me waiting at the front desk with his uniform like hey son! 😂😂👋🏾 If you have children I pray you can laugh at the shenanigans like I’ve been doing for my sanity or else I’ll be picking up my dreadlocks every step. If you don’t still laugh at something today because life’s too damn good not to. Enjoy …

I’m not a politician, sorry.

I’d like to think I came a long way from the overly blunt, rude teenager that I was years and years ago. 16 to be exact. You become wiser, mature and a bit more thoughtful and realize that words hurt and not everything you think of should roll off your tongue. Cool. The adulting process has taught me that while I should think before I react, I still need to be honest with myself and others. What I thought at times was just “letting it go” really said to others “It’s okay to treat me this way”. Even what I choose to listen to says a lot. I.e everybody’s issues or gossip which leaves me drained and distracted from what I have to do. In the recent months I’ve had to address and cut communication with those who only reach out for a favor, promote something or throw their problems at me without a care on how I’m doing. Like WTF do I look like ? One of the girls from Erykah Badu’s “bag Lady …